Friday, May 4, 2007

And I, I Choose the Road Less Traveled...

Is there something about yourself that you would like to change? Not something superficial, like "I wish my nose were smaller" or "I really wish that spot of cellulite would disappear", but something that really bothers you about your personality? What I am about to disclose is not a surprise to anyone who has known me for any amount of time, because it is something that plagues me everytime I try to go somewhere even slightly unfamiliar. I, unfortunately, have about the same sense of direction as a blindfolded drunk trying to whack at a pinata in a tornado. Yes that would be, ah, ZERO. And it. is so. FRUSTRATING!!! Today I went about 15 minutes out of my way to get to where my best friend works, after her husband gave me *explicit* directions on how to get there, complete with finely drawn map. Then, on my way home from aforementioned destination, I took the wrong turn and wasted about 10 minutes, not to mention the ever-increasing-in-cost-gas! And when I get lost, I seriously have, like, anxiety attacks. I sweat, I get nervous, I think about pulling over and sobbing, and I entertain thoughts such as: what if I never get home? maybe I should just find a hotel and stay there until someone comes to get me. would someone come to get me? And it's even worse when my kids are in the car, because just about the time you realize you have made a big boo-boo in the turn-taking, someone either A. has to pee B. needs a snack C. is sick of being stuck in their car seat or D. decides to holler about all 3.
And my poor mother! I think every time I drive to Houston (which I havent done by myself in a while) she worries until I show up, alive, in their driveway. I think that is why she has resorted to meeting Shawn halfway to take the kids and I to Houston. She was probably sick of giving herself gray hairs over worrying about us.
So all of this is to say: I have a fund going for myself called "Help Ashley Choose The Right (turn)!" and the funds will be used for a GPS thingy for my car, as well as map and compass reading classes. Feel free to contribute. Because if you're ever stuck in the car with me as the driver, you'll wish you had.

4 comments:

Karie said...

You have me totally cracking up!!! Now I know why you want to live in small towns! very easy to get around in (ha, ha, just kidding), Are you sure you don't want to move to LA?? At least with every wrong turn there might be something fun to do. Just kidding.
Love your post! it brightened my day!

gibsoncasa said...

Being the daughter of a Surveyor, it has always been difficult for me to understand this! But my husband has this same problem!! A few years ago I bought him a hand held GPS unit (about $100) that he always keeps in the car and traveling with him has been wonderful!! Until recently - it's starting to konk out! It's money that I don't mind shelling out if I need to get another one!

BROKEN said...

You are just like a man .....to proud to stop and ask for directions. Just remember that right is always right.

Brandon & Lisa said...

Oh my heck! I totally remember the drama of that day! And the saddest part is that it was the same road you chose that took you down the wrong path! I love it!!