Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Eeeeeeeewwwww!!!!

Bath time today was very.....shall we say...interesting. Liam and Addy were in there together, as usual, and having a great time, also as usual. About 10 minutes into it, Addy squats and does a little grunt. Now, 2 things: 1. Usually when she does this it means that she is pooping, and 2. The other day she did this same thing in the bathtub and did NOT poop. So I'm sure you can surmise the rest of the story, because you are probably familiar with Murphy's Law. Yes, gentle reader, she pooped. (in case you were wondering, it was a floater). So I quickly yank the kids out of there and set them on the bathroom floor. And as I write this, looking back on it, I am wondering why in the world I did not go stick a diaper on her, but I didn't, so now you have a funnier story to read, because this is where all heck breaks loose. Also, at this point in the story, it helps to know that my kids' bathroom is not very big. So anyway, I start plucking the bath toys from the poopy water so I can clean them and drain the tub, and the whole time Liam is dancing around naked yelling "eeewwww! eewww! thats so gross mama!". About this time Addy figures she might as well finish what she started, so she squats and poops again right on the bathroom rug. Well, this really sets Liam off, and he high-tails it to the top of the potty, like a 50's housewife who's seen a mouse, and stands there giggling and squealing the whole time. I reach for the toilet paper and clean it up (thankfully it was one of those poops that was not...how to say this?... squishy or...wet.). I have to ask Liam to please step down from the potty so I can throw the poopy paper in there. While I am throwing the paper in, ADDISON POOPS AGAIN! I get her away from it, and as I am reaching for the toilet paper, she steps in it!! So she got a big cleaning-off in the sink, and thankfully that was the end of the pooping. Liam was shuttled to my shower to finish getting clean, and Addy was shuttled to bed, and that was the end of that. Of course, that was also the beginning of the Bedtime Wars with Liam, in which I employed the well-known diversionary tactic known as the Backwards Bedtime Fairy. What, you've never heard of her? You mean, you've never proclaimed to your children that it's Backwards Night, and that they must sleep with their head at the foot of the bed, with the promise of a treat under their pillow left by the Backwards Bedtime Fairy herself??? Which reminds me, I need to, I mean... the Fairy needs to, go leave that treat under the pillow, so I will be signing off now. Have a grrrrrreat day!

5 comments:

BROKEN said...

I would have made the DAD clean it up!!

Ashley Mason said...

well, the dad was asleep since he works nights.

Karie said...

1. if you're not sure who broken is, that would be my lovely husband (a.k.a Brother Ken as the kids in Temple used to call him BroKen).
2. That was absolutly hilarious, but I'm most impressed with the backwards fairy. You are way to creative, can you PLEASE move to Houston so I can learn from your creativity????

Ashley Mason said...

Ohhh! I was like "who is this that I dont even know commenting on my blog! And for all they know I could be widowed or divorced!" Ha, that's funny. Hi Ken!

Steph said...

Geoff emailed me this and I thought of your post!

http://www.orapois.com/br/arquivos/09102003084653755g.swf